Saturday, September 10, 2011

Whatever Happened to ... Kelly LeBrock?

I know that a quick check of IMDb or Google can answer the letter of that question, but what about the spirit of that question?

After hitting the scene in the two films below, LeBrock co-starred with then-husband Steven Seagal in 1990’s Hard to Kill.  After that?  Nothing of consequence.  While it isn’t exactly a three-film career arc on James Dean’s level (and LeBrock IS still alive), it does prove that despite a perfect body, a beautiful face, flowing locks, puffy lips, and a mysterious accent, mediocre talent won’t help you last long.


The Woman in Red
1984
Starring Gene Wilder, Judith Ivey, Kelly LeBrock, and Gilda Radner
Directed by Gene Wilder

LeBrock makes her cinematic debut as Charlotte, the object of Teddy’s (Wilder) desires.  In a parking garage, Teddy sees Charlotte dancing over an air vent.  The homage to Marilyn Monroe’s similar scene in The Seven Year Itch (1955) replaces the white dress with a red one, and unlike Monroe, LeBrock readily exposes her undies (matching red satin, of course).  Despite his wife and children, Teddy is determined to bed Charlotte.

Original music by Stevie Wonder includes the Oscar-winning (Best Music, Song) “I Just Called to Say I Love You.”  The other Oscar nominees that year are 80s music staples: “Against All Odds” (from Against All Odds, performed by Phil Collins); “Footloose” (from Footloose, performed by Kenny Loggins); “Ghost Busters” (from Ghost Busters, performed by Ray Parker Jr.); and “Let’s Hear It For the Boy” (from Footloose, performed by Deniece Williams).


Weird Science
1985
Starring Anthony Michael Hall, Kelly Le Brock, Iian Mitchell-Smith, and Bill Paxton
Directed by John Hughes

LeBrock’s sophomore effort caters to the fantasies of teenage (and not so teenage) boys everywhere.  Garry (Hall) and Wyatt (Mitchell-Smith) are high school losers.  With his parents out of town, Wyatt invites Gary to spend the weekend, and they kick it off by donning bras on their heads and “creating” a digital woman on Garry’s computer.  Freakiness ensues and Lisa (LeBrock) materializes as a real – albeit magical – woman.  Using her powers, she treats the boys to cars, parties, and popularity, in addition to treating them to the vision of herself in numerous sexy outfits, all under the pretense of trying to boost their confidence.  Paxton is fun as Wyatt’s jerky brother. 

The soundtrack is comprised of a roster of C-List 80s acts, including Kim Wilde, Wall of Voodoo, OMD, Ratt, and General Public, with Oingo Boingo (fronted by current and frequent Tim Burton film composer Danny Elfman) taking on the title track.